Picnic In A Tiger Cage
by PeechTao
Summary: Mace bets anakin can get in trouble anywhere, but will the boy really jump into a tiger cage to live up to it? day trip to the planetery zoo ends in disaster, rabits, wombats, and tigers included. Hilarious.


I own nothing. Please review, it would be kind! I'll try and answer, I'm a good aurthor . . .sometimes . . . :):)

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Picnic In A Tiger Cage

"Need a break you do." Yoda stated with finality to Mace Windu. The man didn't respond at first, merely continued to hang his head. "Too busy, you are, time off you need. Good for you it will be."

Mace sighed and sat back in his chair. "Too busy, I am." he replied, glancing out of the corner of his eye to see Yoda's reaction to the voice spoof.

"Hmpf!" the small Master retorted. "What I mean, displayed you have! Unfocused you are! Handle the Council, we can. Tomorrow off, you will take."

Mace stood and stretched his back. "If you absolutely must insist, then fine. I'll take tomorrow off. But what, pray tell, am I to do?"

Yoda smiled devilishly. "Accompany Master Obi-Wan and Padawan Anakin you will. Going to see the new planetary zoo, they are."

"What!" Windu asked in shock. "That's no vacation! Skywalker is bound to get in trouble!"

Yoda's face clearly showed his displeasure at the outburst. "Impossible that is! Caged the animals are, electric fences there are, no trouble will he find. More positive, you should be."

"And you should be taller!" He charged, "Letting that boy run rampant in any environment is sure lunacy!" An idea struck him, one that would show his surety. "I'll bet you one hundred credits he'll get in trouble at least once within the first hour."

"Against the Jedi code, betting is." Yoda smiled. "A wager, you have."

* * *

The deal being struck, Mace Windu set out the next day, rather reluctantly regardless of his obvious victory, for the planetary zoo with Obi-Wan and Anakin in tow. They disembarked from their small land speeder at the front gate. Mace set off at once to join a group of fussy children, tugging at their parents arms in a long line in order to receive their admittance stickers.

"I am so not wearing one of those." Anakin stated, starring at the neon sticker with a bright happy face pinned to a crying child. He looked forlornly at his master, appearing old and wise. "Give me a break."

"You must if you are to get in." Obi-Wan replied, unaffected by 'the look'.

"Who's stupid idea was this anyway?" the padawan continued to complain.

"Master Yoda's, so calm down and try to enjoy yourself!"

Anakin appeared more curious then ever. "And he sent Mace? Why? Crodian drug smugglers in the shape of primal apes and feathered birds?"

Obi-Wan looked at him sharply. "**Master Windu**," he emphasized, "is in need of a vacation. Master Yoda thought this would help him unwind. A little R and R couldn't hurt us either."

"So Yoda sent him with us? Is he smoking his geka stick again?"

Obi-Wan wanted to fall full over, lay helplessly unconscious across the pavement until the day was over. But he made a deal and he would follow through. Instead he could only narrow his eyes with a cold chill that resembled nothing less then the most fearsome Sith. "Say that again, Padawan of mine, and find yourself tied to the tail end of a diseased Neku!" he growled with unearthly cruelty.

Anakin tried nodding easily and turned away from him as if the comment had little effect on him. In actuality he turned and thanked the stars Obi-Wan didn't strike him dead, or that Anakin hadn't peed his pants in sheer terror. He resolved to be on his best behavior to make up for the comment. To give his Master and Mace a break for once. He would be the best tourist ever! So, passing by a trash can, he silently disposed of his small light bombs and fire crackers.

Mace returned with their stickers and blatantly slapped one on the master and padawan's chest. After a suppressed sigh from Anakin, the three headed into the zoo. Windu pulled out the map he had grabbed from the ticket counter and scanned over the animal names to find something fierce and ferocious. The place where Anakin couldn't help but get himself into trouble. However, the planet of Earth was unfamiliar too him. He glanced over the map to find the right cage. Llamas? No. Lemur? No. Goat? Buffalo? Lion? Caribou? . . . Aha! Mace could sense the very evilness in the word. Rabbit. He pressed his lips together in satisfaction. This rabbit must certainly be a large terrible shaak looking creature with pointed fangs . . .How would Anakin resist touching it?

"Let's go here." he said, pointing to the rabbit pen.

"Hmm." Obi-Wan muttered, reading the name. "Sounds dangerous."

Anakin rolled his eyes, looking around lazily as the two discussed their moves. An orange and black striped sign caught his eye and suddenly his heart leapt. "How about there!" he suggested quickly, finding the pen on the map. "See, here. The tiger! Let's go see that!"

"Nah, probably just some fuzz covered rodent." Mace Windu mumbled. Folding the map they headed off to the rabbit pen.

Ten minutes later they left the rabbit pen, Mace grumbling under his breath as Anakin stroked a baby rabbit carefully hidden under the folds of his robe.

Mace whipped out his map again and glanced across the names. To make matters worse, there was only twenty more minutes until Mace's bet with Yoda was over. The long line to get the tickets took up nearly half of his hour. He studied the map quickly. Zebra, bison, capybara . . .what was wrong with this planet earth? No Neku caves or Gundark nests to throw the boy in? Wombat . . .Wom-BAT . . .now **that** looked promising. He led them onward to the wombat cage. All the while Obi-Wan was questioning Mace's odd behavior and Anakin was enjoying the sights and remaining silent and passive.

_Perfect Padawan,_ he kept saying to himself, _be the perfect Padawan!_ A sign for the tiger cage stood erected in front of them. Anakin's heart lifted, but they passed by in the opposite direction. He had seen a tiger over the Holonet the night before. They were monstrous creatures with blazing black stripes and shiny orange fur. Not to mention its finger long canines and razor sharp claws. "Can't we go see the tiger?" he asked again in his humblest, kindest tone.

"No, we're going to see the wombats." Mace replied offhandedly, a hidden smile trailing across his lips.

* * *

Mace checked his chrono for a third time upon leaving the wombat cage. He had a mere fifteen minutes left!. Tossing away the map he decided to merely open his eyes and look around doggedly for some fierce creature. Again Anakin was muttering in his ear about titers or something of the sort. So he sighed in defeat and stopped to look at him. "All right, Anakin, where is this creature at that you have such a peculiar fascination with?"

Anakin smiled gleefully, exclaiming how impressed the Masters would be with the animal. He took the lead, twisting and turning throughout the cages to look down into a large pit. Inside the rocky and tree covered plain lay the largest tiger Anakin had ever seen! Then again, it was the first one he had seen also. Nearly instantly he walked off to jump the railing, but duty restrained him. _Perfect Padawan,_ he kept reminding himself.

"Magnificent isn't he?" Anakin asked the two Master's beside him.

Mace was a happy man! Those one hundred credits were his for sure! He should have known that trouble follows Anakin, Mace had no need to seek it out for him. He knew the Padawan wanted to dive right in like some gladiator out of a holo picture, but something restrained him. Mace glanced around as if anyone knew what he was about to do.

_You know you want to. Go ahead in, _he said into Anakin's mind.

_But I really shouldn't,_ Anakin replied, thinking the voice was nothing more then his naughtier half.

_Padawan, don't you even think about going in there! _Obi-Wan said sharply through their bond.

_I wasn't, Master. Today I am the perfect Padawan._

_Sith!_ Mace cursed.

_Padawan! The language!_

_I'm sorry, Master, I can't control my mind right now._

_Yeah right._ Obi-Wan replied disbelieving.

_Go ahead in. No one will care._ Mace taunted further.

_Anakin, what did I tell you? Are you even listening to me?_

_I'm sorry Master, but it is tempting._ Anakin said, thinking more and more about it.

_You know you want to . . ._

_Anakin . . ._

_Sorry, Master . . ._

Mace and Obi-Wan were left standing at the balcony as Anakin did a swan dive into the pit. There were only four minutes left. Mace struck the air with a fist in delight. "Ha! Take that Yoda!"

Obi-Wan looked at him. "What? What do you mean?"

Master Windu checked his attitude. "Uh . . .Anakin, get out of there! I'm ordering you!"

Skywalker ignored him. He strolled up to the tiger cautiously, behind him. If only he could touch him just this once. However, the baby rabbit in his pocket had different ideas. He popped out, hit the ground, and scurried off beneath the great cat's nose. The tiger sprung on its haunches and gave chase.

"No! Bunny!" Anakin raced to save the fury friend.

Mace keeled over in laughter. This was better than he thought. The tiger turned on a dime to catch the bigger prey behind him. Now Anakin chased the rabbit as the tiger chased him. "Master! A little help!"

Obi-Wan shook his head, trying to remain stern though he too wanted to shake with joy. He had struck the same bet Mace had, but instead with Master Ki-Adi-Mundi. Kenobi was now two hundred credits richer! "Sorry, Padawan, you got yourself into that mess!"

Anakin tried to control the angry beast's mind, but like toydarians, earth animals seemed impervious to such tricks. He couldn't leave the poor baby rabbit in there either. Quickly he Force- Pulled the tiny animal into his hand and made an energy propelled leap to the balcony. There he stood, dazed a moment with adrenaline and love for living while below the tiger paced back and forth. The bunny popped out of his pocket, had a look about, and sank back in.

Mace stood up, wiping the tears out of his eyes. "Okay, now I'm feeling better!"

"I definitely agree to that." Obi-Wan added as the two Masters turned away from Anakin and headed off to enjoy themselves.

"I doubt your happiness will last." Anakin said, shrugging.

Both Mace and Obi-Wan paused, turning with skeptically raised eyebrows. "Why?"

"Why? I went in at exactly ten-thirty-five. Which means, you both have lost your bets with Masters Ki and Yoda. By a long ways to say the least. About half an hour past your deadlines."

Mace's eyes grew larger as he stepped closer, motioning frantically to his chrono. "No . . .my chrono says its only . . ."

"I've been using the Force to manipulate your chrono's. Both of yours." Anakin explained simply and nonchalantly, "I knew Master Windu would convince me to go in, while my Master would attempt reverse-psychology. He knows that if he tells me not to do something, I most certainty **will** do it."

Obi-Wan and Mace collapsed on a bench in defeat and wonderment of it all.

Anakin smiled, pulling the rabbit out of his pocket and stroking him. "Yoda, Ki, and myself are going to split the winnings three ways." He breathed in the luscious air around him. "You're right, Master, a little R and R was just what I needed." He smiled in mischief and went off to wander the rest of the park.

The two Masters trudged behind him.

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So how was it? Enjoyable at all? I'm quite happy with it. So, Please review everyone!


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